A “0” birthday is visible on the horizon, and it is stirring up a few emotions, questions, and reflections in me.  Where exactly did the last 10 years go?  What lessons did I learn about myself during that time?  And how do I want to walk through the world with the precious time I have left on the planet?

The answer to the last question is I want to live a more expansive life.  That chosen path includes traveling here and abroad, meeting new people and experiencing new cultures, and stretching my head and my heart in big and small ways.  I want to continue to grow, to learn, and to love unconditionally.  At this point in my life, I can easily rationalize my dream as the reward for more than three decades of work.  Yet the truth lies deep within me.  If there is one central theme throughout my life, it is that I feel most alive, more connected to those I love, and truly authentic when I live expansively.  With a special nod to my mother– who celebrates her 90th birthday this month–and Lady Gaga, I was simply born this way.   

In recent weeks, I find myself looking inward at what might preclude me from living such a life over the next decade.  Of course there are day-to-day realities, family and financial obligations, work commitments, and other vida de adulta considerations.  Most are straightforward to understand and, while sometimes complicated, could be addressed with good communication and thoughtful planning.

Yet the real stumbling blocks to living expansively lie within me.  They appear randomly in the shape of fear and trepidation.  First and foremost is the potential impact on my relationships with my family and close friends.  I wonder how my choice here would impact those I love and hold most dear, and do not want to hurt them in any way.  I too worry that I may feel isolated or disconnected from my family by choice if I live overseas for weeks at a time. 

Then there is the fear of aging and my own mortality.  While I am fortunate to be in good health today, that will inevitably change with the passage of time.  In futbol parlance, we are now into the second half and heading towards injury time.  Just how much playing time is left for me is yet to be determined, and the quality of that playing time may be less than desired.  Recent caregiving experiences with my parents and father-in-law only reinforce that aging is no picnic even with the unconditional love and support of family.  There too is the matter of survivor guilt related to my brothers’ deaths more than 25 years ago.  Grief and loss have been a constant traveling companion for more years than I care to remember.  

These fears are real, and they come in waves.  Yet one thing is crystal clear in my mind.  This is not a choice for me.  I must follow my heart.  To do otherwise would go against my very nature, and that will have physical and mental health consequences for me over time. 

Now more than halfway through 2024, I am exploring different stumbling blocks—dare I say dangers—that lie within our organizations and are preventing leaders from realizing their strategic goals.  Such dangers have the power and potential to cause real harm to our employees, our clients, and the community at large.  Left unaddressed over time, they may even jeopardize the viability and long-term sustainability of our organizations. 

  • The “Us versus Them” Mentality.  Board of Directors vs CEO.  CEO vs Senior Leaders.  Managers vs Employees.  Employee vs Employee.  Employee vs Client.  Direct Program vs Administration.  One Facility vs Another.  This list conjures up leadership nightmares of internal strife and cultural chaos as far as the eye can see.  In reality, these nightmares are playing out every day in organizations across the country.  In response, leaders are now investing significant amounts of time and energy working to resolve internal conflicts.  Today’s leaders are now part parent, teacher, professional coach, guidance counselor, and referee—sometimes all in the same day.  No small wonder then that many leaders are exhausted from all the drama and have less time to focus on the organization’s strategic direction and mission impact.  And the risk of hitting an organizational iceberg increases exponentially because leaders are looking inward all the time.  To combat this danger, leaders would do well to embrace the powerful communications mantra of “one team, our vision, one voice”.  
  • The Weaponization of Language.  Words and phrases such as anti-employee policy, aggressive and hostile work environment, return to office/work from home, toxicity, and trauma bonding are part of the lexicon of today’s workplace.  All warrant the utmost attention and sensitivity from leaders given the negative impact on the overall health and well-being of our workforce and our organizational culture.  Unfortunately, some employees are resorting to emotionally triggering words and phrases in day-to-day conversations without regard to personal or professional accountability to core values.  These employees do so to fight or resist a planned operational change or new initiative and justify the use of such language under the veil of candid and timely feedback to management.  Still others do so to advance their own self-interest through quasi-intimidation among their teams and implied threats towards their leaders.  And in a few rare instances, individual employees create a public firestorm through social media in the hope that their leaders will bow to external pressure.  To combat this danger, leaders would be wise to tamp down the emotional rhetoric whenever possible to ensure a safe workplace for all employees.  
  • The Illusion of Participatory Decision-Making.  Today’s leaders face significant pressure to create new and different ways to engage employees on a myriad of organizational matters.  This pressure is fueled by employees’ nearly insatiable need to know and strong desire for meaningful voice in every aspect of our decision-making process.  Conceptually, the pursuit of this great white whale appears worthy under the desired goals of building trust and advancing transparency within our organization.  Yet that epic quest crashes against the rocks of day-to-day operational realities where resources—notably people, time, and money—are in short supply.  Of course, leaders should seek input from employees on key operational issues, major opportunities and risks, and market developments wherever appropriate.  Yet it is unrealistic to believe that every employee would have a well-informed perspective about every issue before our organizations.  It is impractical and even inappropriate to seek input from each employee on every new hire, promotion, or salary decision, facility expansion or technology update, or major financial investment.  To combat this danger, leaders should clearly articulate the decision-making process for all employees and highlight their specific avenues for input.
  • The Optionality of Individual Accountability.  Victimhood, distraction, avoidance, blame, and excuse all reside in our professional zip codes right now.  And individual leaders are not immune from this one especially when the going gets tough.  In such moments, certain leaders are guilty of resorting to skewed personal and professional narratives about their own accountability.  The real paradox is how we harshly judge the very same behaviors within our teams.  Pot meet kettle here.  Individual leaders are often quick to criticize a lack of accountability in others and can recount specific moments when individual managers identify operational and financial barriers yet bring very little to the table in terms of achievable solutions.  More often than not, we are political commentators on the inner workings of our own organizations rather than positive agents for impactful change.  To combat this danger, leaders should openly discuss with their management teams what individual accountability looks like before, during, and after every major organizational change or new initiative.   
  • The Constant Threat to Leave.  The summer of 2024 may well be remembered as “my way or the highway” season.  In organizations all across the nation, individual employees are increasingly using their market power to demand organizational change.  And their demand for change extends far beyond compensation and benefits and into corporate matters of leadership accountability, diversity, equity and inclusion, and social justice.  When their immediate needs are not met, many employees are quick to play the exit card in the hopes of searching additional concessions from their employer.  Unfortunately, this workforce reality is taking a toll on many leaders at a time when their organizations are investing significant resources yet still struggling to recruit and retain a culturally affirming, diverse, and talented workforce.  To combat this danger, leaders would do well to remember that any professional relationship shrouded by the constant threat of departure is one that every leader should leave first.   

Individually, these dangers pose significant risk to leaders and organizations alike.  Collectively and left unchecked over time, such dangers possess the power to threaten our organizations’ very existence.  Yet we cannot begin to address specific dangers until we first publicly name and own them.  Leadership curiosity, courage, and humility must drive this journey towards greater organizational self-awareness.  Now more than ever, I encourage every leader to do so before it is too late.